Being a mom is hard – The things no one told me about being a mom
Putting a positive spin on motherhood is not an easy task for some. For me, it is really hard to admit how hard motherhood actually is. Becoming a mother can be a scary time. That’s just it, the bottom line is that being a mom is hard. And granted you see articles and posts about it all of the time, there are some things no one told me about being a mom and one of them is that some days it flat out SUCKS.
That’s right, I said it, it SUCKS some times. So here’s the deal mama, I’m going to be brutally honest with you but in the end, know that motherhood is the most rewarding feeling in the world (most days).
Becoming a mother is hard from the get-go
Getting pregnant isn’t easy for some. Pregnancy is not easy for some and for me, personally, I didn’t enjoy pregnancy all that much. The sickness, the cravings, the rules OH MY GOSH THE DAMN RULES. One of the things no one told me about being a mom is how the pregnancy rules are outrageous. They are completely and totally restricting.
No cold lunch meat (I LOVE club sandwiches!) Exercise more, but not too much, vitamins, supplements, activities that you can and can’t do, things you can and can’t drink. the tests, the exams, the labs. It is NOT all that glamorous.
BUT! Wait until you feel that first kick when the morning sickness is over and you can feel that babe moving around. YOU DID THAT MAMA. You are GROWING a human being inside of you and that is such an amazing thing. It truly is a miracle and know that the rules are there for a reason, to protect both you and your unborn baby. becoming a mother all of a sudden seems amazing!
Even though being a mom is hard, the second trimester of pregnancy is the best. I’ll be honest, then the third trimester comes. Those kicks start to hurt a bit, you have to pee all of the time, you’re full all of the time and can’t wait to get that precious baby OUT of there, babe will be here soon enough!
The lack of sleep STINKS
It’s real mama, it really is. Hate to break it to you, but in becoming a mother, the lack of sleep during the newborn stage freaking stinks. Because again, BEING A MOM IS HARD! People might have told you about the lack of sleep, but I wish they would have told me that I am going to feel guilty, I’m going to feel tired, and I will cry on a daily basis because you know… hormones. The mom guilt is heavy and real every day, being exhausted should not make you feel that mom guilt but it does.
There’s hope and you will end up getting more sleep eventually. Those baby snuggles in the middle of the night are something I miss every day but I definitely do NOT miss being overly exhausted to the point of tears and shaking. Don’t forget to take care of yourself and get some sleep. Have someone help you, it is OKAY to NOT BE OKAY. and it is OKAY to ASK FOR HELP!
No one told me how hard it is to watch them grow
This one gets me. It’ll get you too. You see posts about “stop growing up baby” or “I can’t believe how big he’s getting”. What isn’t said here is HOW HARD IT IS to actually watch them grow up and WHY.
That’s your baby. Becoming a mother started over one year ago, that baby was growing inside of your belly. You gave birth and snuggled, you held your baby until they stopped crying. You fed them only milk for what felt like the longest time. These days seem like the longest days of your life. You blinked. Now that same baby is sitting, crawling, walking, and talking back. Now that baby doesn’t want your help anymore because “I DO IT!”
Don’t wish away those long days because what no one told me is that you’ll actually miss them and it is so hard to watch them grow up because they don’t “need” you anymore. (In reality, they will ALWAYS need you).
I now wish that my baby still wanted my help more often than not (he’s 4 guys…. HE’S FOUR) and doesn’t need my help for anything. Be careful what you wish for.
Being a mom is hard, no one told me about discipline
I had to seek out how to discipline our children. Every child is different and every parent is different. What works for you and your kids might not work for another parent and their child.
Not ONLY did no one really tell me about discipline and how hard it would be to figure out and implement. But they did not tell me how to prepare for the mom guilt that went with it. When you say “1, 2, 3 take five”, be ready for your heart to sink, a child to scream at the top of their lungs and prepare for the longest (minutes in however many years old they are).
No one told me that it’s better to use only 3-4 words because kids can’t retain long winded explanations! (I mean really… do you want to sit there and get scolded for minutes on end)? No. Didn’t think so.
The last of the things no one told me about being a mom
Is how truly wonderful and rewarding it is. There are two extremes to motherhood. How bad it can suck some times, and how amazingly wonderful it can be.
You’re going to feel sick during pregnancy, labor and delivery is not a walk in the park. You’re going to be so tired because being a mom is hard no matter who you are, how old your children are, or how many you have. Either way, make sure you are prepared to bring that baby home!
The days they say “I love you so much” or the days they say “thank you mama”, “will you lay with me” … And more… You’ll get flooded with good emotions and realize you are doing a great job. Love is the greatest gift, and those kids do love the shit out of you whether you believe it or not.
Remember this one thing from these things no one told me about being a mom…
This too shall pass. Marriage will change and your life in general…for the better! No matter what you’re going through, it will pass, and then it’ll be onto the next thing, the next stage in life. Becoming a mother is an adventure and that is why it’s so wonderful. Hang in there, keep your head up and when the time comes, let that baby of yours spread their wings and fly on their own because you did an amazing job Mama. Your babe will always need you and fly home to their safe place when they need to.